This may seem like a really random topic, and in a way, it is. This is also very long, and mildly goes back and forth between topics. That is your warning.
For the past 10 years (at least that's how long I'm willing to admit), I've never really acted my age. Though I've been to a few high school/college "parties", I've never ever enjoyed them. I've always felt out of place. For everyone who surrounded me, that was the life for them. Parting, drinking, and hanging out with friends. And that's the way they wanted it to stay, for AT LEAST another 10 or so years. Which, if that's your thing, isn't necessarily bad. I get it; its fun, it's a stress reliever, and a way to hang out with friends and enjoy life. It's just never been my thing.
Instead, while "normal" people my age are out having that kind of fun, I prefer things on a much softer scale. I spent most of my high school weekends reading, watching childish shows like the ones on Disney Channel or Nick (heck, I didn't even get obsessed with Degrassi till I was 20 and in college) and I preferred them to almost any other shows. Even when I had my "wilder" streak (that everyone gets at some point-don't try to act innocent), I still wasn't that bad. Even though my mom would say we had some pretty tough times (my sis-the witness to most of these battles-can agree), I think even she would admit that I could have been so much worse.
I'm kinda straying off topic, let me get back on track! Point is, I've never been a "wild" kind of person. I don't like loud and crazy concerts. I don't enjoy drinking alcohol, wine, or anything honestly besides water. I don't really have a strong urge to surround myself with 20-30 friends at any given time. I don't like to stay out late, or anything to that nature.
In fact, I am, and always have been, the complete opposite. I've always dreamed of my future. My future wedding, my future kids, my future family. Not that my current family isn't good enough, I love you all to death-I promise! Just, the idea of having my own house to clean and organize, my own kids to raise, my own husband to cook for, my own crazy busy schedule with dance classes, soccer practices, and school recitals...well, to me that's always been the ideal future. (not necessarily in that order either) And I've always wanted it ASAP.
I'm finally at that point in my life where that future is no longer a distant image, teasing me from afar. I can see the road, and all the little steps I have to take till I'm holding all that at the grasp of my fingertips-so to speak. I'm thrilled to the point that I can not even begin to explain.
I spent so many wasted years looking for the guy to do all this with, when the one I needed and wanted all along was at my side through almost every twist and turn in my life-at least the ones since I was 14. He knew almost everything about me. More than anyone else ever had. And I'm not just saying that. He was my best friend. I had girl best friends which I told a lot to too, but never the deeper stuff for some reason. All my issues went to this guy. He knew all my mistakes, my desires, my thoughts and opinions, and he never ever, NOT ONCE, judged me for them. And trust me, I deserved to be judged more than a few times. But that's what made him my best friend. I was never embarrassed around him, I never felt the need to lie, embellish, or go around a topic. He was always there for me. Like a best friend should be.
We liked each other in high school. We weren't fooling anyone but ourselves by denying it. We played with the topic a few times, but nothing serious came of it. So guys came and went for me, and girls came and went for him. Then, 8 years down the road, we finally reached a point in our lives where we admitted we wanted more. We admitted we always have, we probably always will. Acting upon the decision to start dating was, and forever will be, the greatest decision of my life. (Our wedding and the birth of our kids will surly be my greatest moments, but this is without a doubt the greatest decision.)
We both knew very early on that it was going to be him and I for the rest of our lives. I'm not sure what point our families realized it, but I can guarantee you, it didn't take long for us to start laying around and spending our time daydreaming about our futures. We were best friends for almost 8 years (minus our"lost" years, but we try to forget our "friendship breakup" ever happened), we didn't need to spend time talking about the usual "dating" topics. We both knew what the other wanted from life (and it was pretty much the same things), we both knew ALL about the others past relationships (and loved and respected each other regardless), we both knew about mistakes, struggles and the greatest moments that we had up till that point. Considering we pretty much grew up together, we knew almost all there was to know.
Fast forward it to this moment. We both realize that within the next 2-3 years, our lives are going to change BIG time. Marriage, babies, and (hopefully) a house are all in the VERY near future. And trust me, neither of us could be more excited. We both talk about how we wish it was all happening now.
And that leads me to the whole purpose of this post. Everything I've ever wanted from life is finally unfolding in front of me. That doesn't scare me, and I would never ever think about pushing these events back any further, but even I have to admit that I'm starting to focus on what I want to do before babies appear in my present, not just future.
Not your usual "do before you get pregnant" things. (well not all :p) Mostly it's all just simple things that I want to start doing. I want to start going out more often, not just staying at home and sleeping all day. And on the flip side, I want to start cherishing said sleep. Lord knows that 3 years from now it will be a foreign word. I also want to get myself in shape, I know after having kids my body will change and I want to be in the healthiest possible shape to jump start the recovery stage after birth. I want to visit a few more states (and revisit NYC), see real snow (enough to make a snow angel), go to Europe (hopefully we can do that for our honeymoon). I want to go to the airport with Javi one day and just jump on the next plane out for the day and see where it leads us, with no worries other than just the 2 of us. I want to spend some more time with my sister, just her and I. After babies come into play, our time together will never be the same. I want to start learning things from my mom, I never paid much attention to her advise in the past (I'm sorry mom!) and I know she has so much advise waiting for me to take. I want to spend more time with my dad, let him know that I appreciate all the hard work he has done to give me the life I have. I'd like to talk to my brother more often, but he's always busy with his own life so we will see how that goes. I want to do some volunteer work and help make a positive difference (I'm hoping to keep this one going even after kids, I want them to know the importance of helping others).
Just random little things like that. I want to start doing more with my time, because everything I've ever wanted is closer than ever to coming true.
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