In Life and Death

So I've come to the conclusion that, although it's a very very difficult time for Javis family right now, our wedding has become a silver lining for them.

I was so worried about the funeral and the wedding being so close to each other (not for our sake but because it doesn't allow much grieving time for anyone on his side) but during the rosary and the funeral I realized that people were doing one of 2 things to Javi and I:
A) they were focusing on our wedding, asking us questions, and just plain congratulating us and that in turn made things (even just slightly) easier for them. It was something to bring a smile to their faces. It was a mini escape from the sorrow. Kinda like that one flower that blooms in a desert. This obviously was the happier option.
Or B) they constantly reminded us that Javis uncle wanted so badly to celebrate with us at the wedding. It was one of the things he wanted most before going on to heaven, and tons of people brought it to our attention over and over again (through teary eyes). This was the sadder route of course, but I believe it still helped people because it was always accompanied with something along the lines of '' now he has the best seat for the wedding''.  It's something hopeful, a way from them to know he is still with us all. It's an instant reminder that, yes he won't be here in person anymore, but he will absolutely be here in spirit. In a situation like death, hope is beautiful.

On the drive up I was kind of dreading wedding talk. With the wedding being next week it was unavoidable, but I just was worried we would come across as self centered or something. To me, a death is bigger then a wedding (that's my fear of anything death related right there) . But I guess I finally realized that it's ok. Everyone is looking forward to a happy break from the sadness, and a wedding is just the perfect thing.

And besides. Like everyone said, he now gets honored with the perfect view.

You will be missed Uncle Paul. We all love you dearly.

Until next time,
Tiffany